When Donor Milk is Freeing
What made you want to breastfeed?
It just felt like it was naturally what I was supposed to do.
How did you prepare to nurse?
I read the articles, joined some Facebook groups, researched pumps, etc. but really nothing can prepare you for it. There are a million different issues that can arise and a million different solutions to those issues that are so unique to mom and baby. I thought breastfeeding would be this naturally occurring, peaceful bonding time, and while it can be, it definitely isn't always.
What struggles do you have and what have you done to work through them?
She was a planned c-section but everything started out great. She latched easily in the recovery room and continued to seem to eat well.
But my daughter had a pretty severe tongue tie that we were not able to get revised until 3 weeks. Possibly related, my supply just wasn't enough to sustain her at that time and she lost a lot of weight after birth and didn't get back to birth weight until 4 weeks.
We were fortunate to find donors with Human Milk for Human Babies (Facebook Group) to help supplement her. We tried so many things to help increase my supply, including triple feeding her for nearly 6 weeks.
Eventually I realized that this not only wasn't increasing my supply by much, but just wasn't working for our family. Since then we have had a much more relaxed approach and have found a system that works for us and keeps her growing and thriving. We are fortunate enough to have a recurring donor for supplement milk, and my supply has become sustainable through trial and error.
What kind of support do you have?
My partner, Aaron, has been an amazing support. From helping with triple feeding sessions every 3 hours, to picking up supplements or lactation treats when he sees them - he is always a big part of our journey. He has even given some shoulder rubs when they are sore from lazy positioning.
On the flip side there is always so much conflicting advice and it’s not always supportive. There will always be the "just give her a bottle" or "why do you keep doing it if you don't make enough" people. You have to learn to not let them effect you.
How has covid changed your plans?
I gave birth in May 2020 so my resources at the hospital and in general were pretty limited. The breastfeeding classes and hospital tour I had planned were canceled. There were also limited lactation services while we were admitted. I was able to find an IBCLC that was willing to come to our home. I tried online breastfeeding support groups, but just didn't feel I was connecting much through the "zoom" style. We also had to wait to get her tongue tie revised.
What are your breastfeeding goals?
My original plan was to at least do 6 months. If things go to plan, which who knows with how this year is going, I won't have to go back to work until January, so I hope to make it to 8. But I’m trying not to put pressure on myself.
When do you love about nursing?
I can soothe, nourish, comfort, bond and so much more with my daughter when we nurse. It just creates such an amazing connection that I will cherish forever.
What is something you always want to remember about your breastfeeding relationship with your daughter?
In her first few days, she would wrap just her pinkie around my pinkie when we would nurse. I made her a lot of pinkie promises those groggy sleepless nights. Looking back on those nights I'm glad I persevered towards my goal.
What advice do you have for other moms?
Find what works best for you and your baby. It will be a lot of trial and error, and I mean a lot. Plus, a lot of learning how your body responds, a lot of learning about your baby, a lot of seeking out resources. Everyone's journey looks so different, but everyone's end goal should be being healthy and happy.
Thank you
Thank you so much for reading Laura’s story. Have you struggled with your supply? We would love to hear about it in the comments. Come back tomorrow for the next story in our project. And if you want your very own session, send me a message to get the conversation going.
